Frequently Asked Questions

Can I send a book to an inmate?

Every prison has different rules on this, so check with the correctional facility for the rules at that institution. If book are allowed, most of the time the book must be mailed to the inmate from the bookstore or the publisher – not directly from you. Doing this is simple. When you buy the book at the bookstore tell the clerk that you need the book mailed to an inmate and give the full address – name, inmate number, dorm number, etc. Then stress to the bookstore clerk the importance of having the book mailing in a bookstore letterhead envelope. Sending the book in an unmarked envelope will not do. It will be returned. You will be required to pay the postage in addition to the cost of the book. If you are ordering the book on-line, make sure you have communicated the above information clearly to the on-line ordering system.


What should I wear to a visit?

Almost every prison has a dress code for visitors. You can call the prison ahead of time for a list of the dress code requirements. Some good guidelines to follow are:

Wear something comfortable! The visit can be emotional enough without having to deal with clothes that are too tight or not your style.

Do not wear any item of clothing that is the same color as the inmate uniform. For example, no white t-shirts (even if it has a logo on it) if the inmates wear white.

Do not wear shirts that show any midriff or clevelage.

Wear short or long-sleeved shirts, and make sure the short sleeves are not cap sleeves.

Do not wear see-through materials at all, even if you are wearing something underneath.

If you are allowed to take in a jacket or a sweater to the visit do so, even if you don’t think you will need it. Often the visit room will be much cooler than you expect. And if you don’t wear it you can always use it as a cushion to sit on!

The visits are so emotional for me. Will this ever get easier?

In our experience as family members of prisoners, the answer is “yes.” We don’t ever get used to the idea of our loved one being incarcerated, but the routine of visits will get easier as time goes on, especially if you are doing all you can for your health and wellbeing while your family member goes through their life experience.

 

 

Do you have a question – or answer? E-mail either one to extendedfamily@tds.net.